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    January 22, 2005

    Sand! Glorious Sand!

    It's been a crappy week! What else can you say about a week filled with sneezing, a stuffy and simultaneously runny nose, hobbling around on crutches, stressing over a new career move, a disconnected telephone because Verizon employees are a buncha nitwits that absolutely refuse to correct a year long dispute over a billing issue that is THEIR OWN FAULT and even though you've paid them, the damn phone won't be turned back on until Monday!?!? We go through this every few months and quite frankly, I am willing to MOVE TO ANOTHER COUNTRY if that's what it takes to put and end to my never-ending dispute with the phone company from HELL! I've had similar experiences with Verizon [SATAN'S SPAWN] Wireless, but hey, their DSL service rocks, so I guess I'll continue to be a disgruntled Verizon customer. I mean it's not like THERE IS ANY OTHER FRIGGIN TELEPHONE COMPANY I CAN SWITCH TO around here, but ...I digress.

    So today I go to my mailbox, where I found my very first letter from Brian, my sweetheart of a guy who is GOD KNOWS WHERE at this point because we haven't talked for several days now. It was post marked January 3rd and it took some 19 days to find its way to me! I sat in my car, ripped it open, pulled the letter out and what do I find? Sand! Yes, you read that right! Sand poured out from the pages, right into my lap. I'm not sure how it got there. Perhaps Brian was playing in a Kuwaiti sandbox whilst putting pen to paper and professing his love to me across the miles. I suppose anything is possible. Maybe the mail truck/camel [?] got stuck in a sand storm or perhaps a really big sand dune somewhere in the Kuwaiti desert. I sat in my car for 30 minutes, with tears streaming down my face, reading it over and over.
    After my tear fest, I went out and paid some bills, then started on a care package to send for Valentine's Day. This will be the first of the care packages I plan on sending over the next year, and it will be the guinea pig of the bunch. There is no telling how long it will take to get there! The last time we spoke, we agreed that I should just send things to his Iraq address since he won't be at the Kuwait address much longer. I'm hoping that he isn't stressed about missing this Valentine's Day. I know that he loves me and that we will have many, many Valentine's Day's to celebrate once he's back. I'll be happy with a letter, and I am thrilled with the one I got today and I have to admit that's the BEST DAMNED SAND I have ever seen!
    Jack LaLanne Juicer


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